Kid Rock Mostly Brags In His Latest Interview

An arguably one-hit wonder, Kid Rock, now has a brand new record, tentatively titled “First Kiss”, scheduled to be released this February. In a weird interview in the Guardian, he mostly bragged about being a rule breaker and went on with tirade of uncalled political statements.

Kid, it’s okay to brag but please stop when you think to repeat anything below:

About the internet: “I don’t FaceTweet or whatever people do. I understand that I’m the old guy now. I turn on my computer and look at pr0n a little bit, see what’s going on in the news, but that’s about it. I’m comfortable with that.”

About his politics: “I am definitely a Republican on fiscal issues and the military, but I lean to the middle on social issues. I am no fan of abortion, but it’s not up to a man to tell a woman what to do. As an ordained minister I don’t look forward to marrying gay people, but I’m not opposed to it.”

Why did he perform for Obama? “I played Barack Obama’s inauguration even though I didn’t vote for him. I didn’t agree with his policies, but there was an exciting sense of change in the air. That promise hasn’t been fulfilled — the country is more divided than ever.”

All his cash: “I’m not just wealthy, I’m loaded. I can say that because I’m not embarrassed — I’ve made a f***-ton of money, but I’ve never made a dishonest dollar. I try to do right by the people around me.”

His “redneck” cred: “I’m 43 and about to become a grandfather, but it keeps my redneck street cred up. I could be a great-great-great-grandfather by the time I’m 80. I am excited, but also nervous for my son. He was dropped on my doorstep at six months when I had no money and was trying to be a rock star. I didn’t have a clue.”

Guns: “I’m always buying more guns. I have everything from a Civil War cannon to an MP5 machine gun and old police guns. If someone invades your house, yeah, you can shoot them. I don’t think crazy people should have guns.”

Why he’ll never be PC: “Rap-rock was what people wanted at the time, and they still love those songs at shows. But it turned into a lot of bullsh*t and it turned out to be pretty gay … If someone says you can’t say ‘gay’ like that you tell them to go f*** themselves. You’re not going to get anything politically correct out of me.”